resolving conflicts...
after being on this earth for so long. i realise that there is a common tactic that people use to resolve conflicts. i call this "u can do it, so why cant i." this method is reminds me of tai chi, pushing the blame from oneselves back onto others. okay, imagine a son caught smoking by their parents. when confronted, he can say "daddy can smoke so why cant i?" logical? sounds pretty much logical to me. imagine another scenario, a guy caught two timing by his girlfriend. a few years later, his girlfriend decide to leave him because she fancies another guy. when the guy confront her, she defence was "u did this last time, so why cant i do this?" well, sounds logical to me. i bet it sounds logical to u too.
now let me introduce u to another variant of this defence. its called "since now i have done it, u have the license to do it too." example? imagine a guy slept with another girl, the girlfriend found out and confronted him. his defence is simply "since now i have done it, u have the license to do it too."
now, my personal views on these kind of defence. firstly, on the person who produces this defence, he/she simply pushes the fault onto others, thus making others answer for his/her actions. in the end, the problem is still there. the boy will still continue smoking and the relationship between the couple will continue to worsen. secondly, the person has no intention of resolving the conflict, no intention of finding the real solution to the problem, simply finds the easy way out. by giving this sort of defence, he/she is saying that since so-and-so has done it, thus i can do it too, case close. in the end problem still unresolved. luckily i have a counter move for this type of defence. next time if u hear someone using this type of pathetic defence for him/her self, u just reply "then _______ (fill in the name of the person he\she puts the blame on) eats shit, u also eat shit is it?". so please dont use this kind of defence for urself. problems still left unsolved, and spirals downwards.
haha, anyway, does it sound logical to u? maybe it does, maybe it doesnt. anyway, i dont know what i'm talking about. my examples are not real life examples okay? so dont go around speculating.
oh ya, i'm dam sick of being nice, people will just take u for granted. i cant deal with this shit anymore. if i have to blow, i'll just blow. i wont even care...
now let me introduce u to another variant of this defence. its called "since now i have done it, u have the license to do it too." example? imagine a guy slept with another girl, the girlfriend found out and confronted him. his defence is simply "since now i have done it, u have the license to do it too."
now, my personal views on these kind of defence. firstly, on the person who produces this defence, he/she simply pushes the fault onto others, thus making others answer for his/her actions. in the end, the problem is still there. the boy will still continue smoking and the relationship between the couple will continue to worsen. secondly, the person has no intention of resolving the conflict, no intention of finding the real solution to the problem, simply finds the easy way out. by giving this sort of defence, he/she is saying that since so-and-so has done it, thus i can do it too, case close. in the end problem still unresolved. luckily i have a counter move for this type of defence. next time if u hear someone using this type of pathetic defence for him/her self, u just reply "then _______ (fill in the name of the person he\she puts the blame on) eats shit, u also eat shit is it?". so please dont use this kind of defence for urself. problems still left unsolved, and spirals downwards.
haha, anyway, does it sound logical to u? maybe it does, maybe it doesnt. anyway, i dont know what i'm talking about. my examples are not real life examples okay? so dont go around speculating.
oh ya, i'm dam sick of being nice, people will just take u for granted. i cant deal with this shit anymore. if i have to blow, i'll just blow. i wont even care...
posted by ray at 1:56 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home